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I am the youngest child. I think it had a lot to do with my personality.

As the youngest of four kids and one of three boys. Additionally, I am four years younger than my next sibling. I had an intensely close relationship with the next closet sibling, my brother Vincent. Being the youngest meant always watching the older siblings do stuff and being a "tag-along". That means that you weren't always welcome but you could still participate. For the most part this meant that I got to see things that were way above my age of understanding. But it also meant that I always felt like I shouldn't be there. Not really part of the group so to speak. As a result, I bonded more closely with my maternal grandmother during the first 11 years and had a lot to do with my formation of beliefs on religion, fairness, and justice. That was later transformed further by my relationship with Vincent and my parents.

Strangely enough, I never got hand-me-downs. At least not clothing and not toys. And as a result, I believe that my parents treated each child separately as their own individuals. I spent four years by myself as the only child at home after living in a house that was constantly busy. THat mean I had to adjust to being alone. And as a result, I don't really get lonely. I'm quite happy with all the stuff I have going on in my head to the point where I usually don't notice that I'm actually physically alone.

I look at the rest of my family and I see the similarities But of all the kids, I'm the one that stands out the most as the loner.


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Vernard Martin

April 2017

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